selling prestige

the mail lady comes yesterday, and my kid actually walks up to my room, gets me out of bed, and says that he may have some bad news for me. apparently, we’ve recieved a “black envelope”. there must be a custom that he read about or stumbled over in a videogame where letters that announce a death in the family are delivered in black envelopes and resemble wedding invitations in feel.

so, i’m like “what the hell are you talking about?”

he hands me the envelope, and it says right across the return address “Black Card”. that’s a little too subtle, so i bet him $2 it’s a credit card offer. he denies the offer of the wager (he folds).

sure enough, it’s a VISA product from Barclays Bank in DE. what makes this card different?

“it is limited to only 1% of the U.S. residents to ensure the highest caliber of personal service is provided to every Cardmember”. how they pick that 1% isn’t mentioned, but i’m sure it’s designed to make me feel special. the card has the following bullet points:

limited membership
24-hour concierge service
exclusive rewards program
luxury gifts
patent pending carbon card (yep, instead of plastic)
annual fee $495

that last one is a doozey. i just got a credit card offer in a nice packaging that will cost a mere $500 a year. how can i not JUMP at that? a small price to pay for the honor of being included in this cast of “exclusive members”.

and the funny thing is if this thing works 10 lousey times, you’ve got $5k in revenue.

24 hour concierge, as if my whole life is a hotel stay. are they gong to bring me beers at 3am on a tuesday if i run out? or maybe a pizza instead? give me a break. more fodder for the burn barrel.

July 24, 2009 Posted in: Uncategorized