i need to make friends with sleep

if i can do that ONE thing in 2010, it will improve my life in unbelievable ways. 

today, being the holiday, is a very odd day.  but, that brings it all out into the open.  i got to bed at 3:15 or so, which is typical if you work until 2:30am.  actually, it’s pretty good.  most people get out of work at 5pm and might hit the hay at 10/11 or so, which is five/six hours later.  for me that kind of experience puts pillow time at 8am, or well after sun-up.   THAT will totally wreck a day.

the bother is the boy child was already up a 3 wanting to “inspect” the christmas packages.  and what the hell, he’s 13 and he’s excited and wants to know if he’s getting what he asked for.  and it’s one of those things that you can decipher by picking up the box and shaking it.  (no, he didn’t find it)

the emotion carries over to the morning, and he shakes me at 6am.  i’m closing in on 3 hours into the sleep cycle, so i protest and get another 1/2 hour reprive.  i’m not sure how much of a difference that made, but i get up and we do the gift unwrapping.  and it’s always great stuff.  i hit the coffee pot hard and i bang down the chocolates from the stocking and i make it through it a happy person.  dazed, but happy. 

and then BLAM.  i crash.  it’s the end of the buzz, and the payment came due from the sleep debt.  and so i get another two hours.  now i’m close to five hours for the cycle.  and off to grandmother’s house we go.  which is awesome.  great food, great people, really good times.  four hours into this i’m looking for soft spots on the floor.  they’re there too, which makes it really tempting.

but i hold out and we all make it home.  and then i get a nap, and wake up when the body/mind feel like coming awake.  i dunno, might have been another hour, but at that point i feel a lot more like myself.  maybe it’s an important hour.  so, i’m up and we can officially start the day.  but, the next thing i know it’s 8:30 and the rest of the family is in bed.  my brain has been scrambled enough that playing a mind game like poker is not in the cards. 

so i play some Call of Duty (Modern Warfare 2 – BragLion on the xBox, ahem, it’s the kid’s account – hit me up if you’re brave), bang out some achievements, tilt back some dark rum and cokes, and find myself sitting here.    at 10:30.  and it occurs to me, once again, that i spend too much of my life fighting sleep at night, and gripping the covers too tight in the morning.

the geek in me says “that’s just not optimal”.

and i think a lot of it developed from the fact that a lot of what i do is set by my own schedule.  so, if i have any energy there is no “well, tomorrow i’ll get up early and start on project X”.  instead it’s “i should start on project X now”.  and you just keep going until the sleep demon takes away your ability to do something productive.  now, that’s faded over the past two/three years, but i think that’s where it all started. 

hehe, i can hear tommy angelo now.  practice sleeping.  or better yet, practice falling asleep.  take a shower, put some night clothes on, turn off all of the 37 lights in the house that aren’t being used, turn off the tv and the computers, get the dog out of the bed, and settle in with a fresh pillow.

December 26, 2009   Posted in: Uncategorized

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