Whiskey Chaser

it happens.  it happens to me a lot.  so much so that i’m surprized i haven’t learned to knock it off yet.  but, i’m coming closer.

i take a bad beat, or worse yet, an acceptable beat.  i’ve taken several in the past two days.  AI on the flop with AA v KQ where he lands the K.  river comes another K.   goodbye stack #1. 

i get it in pre against a shortStacker my KK v AJ - Ace on the flop.  standard, no? goodbye 1/2 stack.

then a hand like this, where i probably don’t play it optimally.  if anyone clicks the link, the flop button bet thinking was “if i bet here, i might take it down.  if i get a call, i have some strong draws.” 

the c/r was giving me less odds than i needed to call, but there’s a turn and a river to go.  i pick up outs on the turn, and even against a set i still have flush outs and a gutshot, plus possible overcad outs.  if an overcard hits me, the plan is to check behind on the river, tbh.

whatever, i never get there. could it be played better?  probably.  but do you see the creep setting in?  i feel like i went from “i’m ahead” situations that landed heads instead of tails to situations where i’m not really ahead.  i’m actually a little behind, and not letting go. 

toss in a hand like this one.  i mean, it’s not the worst thing that could happen.  but, it’s not so good either. and i can feel the grease under my feet and that slippery slope starts to take me.

it’ll generally end in what i don’t recognize in time as being a full blown tilt-fest resulting in brilliant plays like this.

so, all in all, 1,000 hands and -4.5BI, and it’s a combination of variance, and clouded judgement.  and it’s a tiny swing, i know that.  i just need to take my pattern of

• 1 bad beat
• 2 losses in 7:3 or 2:1 pots
• 1 stupid stack-off

and change it.  it’s just that last part, it’s unhealthy.

now this iteration hasn’t hurt my psyche near as much as others have, and if tomorrow i run KK into AA, or A2o that hits on the river, i’ll be ok with that.  but somewhere before i hit item #3 i have to either gain another measure of self control, or quit. 

i’d prefer developing the ability to control my mind in the face of the obviously inevitable swings of win some/lose some to  quitting, but in the short term, either will do.  just as long as it keeps me from putting the checkmark in the ”stupid stack off” box.